Friday, April 12, 2013

1.        According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, people are voluntarily quitting their jobs at the highest rate in five years.   ***  In fact, the trend is so strong that millions of unemployed people are now hoping to find work so they can quit, too.

 

2.        According to a survey by Harris Interactive, 83% of American workers are stressed out at work.   ***   Now the Obama Administration is trying to take credit for giving so many Americans a stress-free life of unemployment.

 

3.        Researchers at the University of Missouri have traced laziness to a certain gene and say that it is hereditary.   ***  And you’ll know you’ve inherited that gene if every evening you fight your dad for the couch. 

 

4.        A study by the Erie Insurance Group has concluded that daydreaming while driving is five times more dangerous than texting.   ***  And the most dangerous habit of all?  Daydreaming about texting.

 

5.        Scientists say that people living in states along the East coast should be prepared for billions of cicadas which will be emerging this spring after spending the first 17 years of life underground and out of sight.  ***  In other words, the way we’d like to see teenagers.

 

6.        According to a study published in “Current Biology,”  the gurgling and lip smacking noises made by baboons may shed light on the origins of human speech.   ***  Or at least explain the behavior of men in bars.

 

7.        President Obama phoned California Attorney General Kamala Harris and apologized for saying she was “the best looking attorney general.”  ***  And, he reluctantly cancelled plans for the “First Annual Attorney General Wet T-Shirt Contest” on the White House lawn.

 

8.        Captain Kirk’s “phaser” from the TV show “Star Trek” has just sold at auction for $231,000.   ***  It got such a high price because it’s so unique.  It’s the only weapon not covered under Joe Biden’s proposed gun law.

 

9.        Thieves in Maine have been stealing sap from maple trees.   ***  The police have not yet made any arrests, but they believe the getaway driver was a “Mrs. Butterworth.”

 

10.      According to a study published in the journal “Arteriosclerosis, Thrombosis and Vascular Biology,” walking and running are equally good for your health.   ***  Unless a bear is chasing you.  Then, running is better.