News for Week Ending Friday, Oct 30, 2015

1.        According to a study by the Mayo Clinic, cat bites are extremely dangerous and 1 out of 3 people bitten by a cat need hospital care.  ***  Cat experts say if you are bitten by a cat, you should immediately post the experience on Facebook (preferably with a video) and then head to the nearest ER.

2.        Taylor Swift is suing radio host Robert Mueller for allegedly groping her backstage in 2013, but Mr. Mueller says it was actually done by the station manager, Eddie Haskell.  ***  His accusation was supported by both Wally and the Beaver.

3.        Detroit police had to break up a street brawl involving angry parents at a youth cheerleading contest.  ***  The actual fight wasn’t much, but the cheering was exceptional. (“Hit ‘em high!  Hit ‘em low!  Come on Mom, L-e-e-e-e-t’s go!”)

4.        The Detroit Lions have fired offensive coach Joe Lombardi and replaced him with assistant coach Jim Bob Cooter.  Of course, the Lombardi name is legendary in football,   ***  while the Jim Bob name is legendary in the moonshine business, numerous sitcoms and The Waltons.

5.        Wal-Mart announced it is exploring the use of drones for home delivery.  ***  Great! Now Wal-Mart customers won’t have to spend so much time getting all dressed up to go shopping.

6.        On this date in history: 1833 - The first U.S. college fraternity with a fraternity house is founded.   ***  Sales of beer and togas skyrocket.

7.        On this date in history: 1612 - King James gives lute player Robert Dowland the title of “Court Lutenist.”  ***  Mr. Dowland says he prefers to be called “Cool Hand Lute.”

8.        On this date in history: 1636 - Harvard University is founded in Cambridge, Massachusetts.  ***  In Cambridge stores, sales of pipes and tweed jackets skyrocket.

9.        On this date in history: 1881 - Wyatt Earp, Doc Holliday & the Clanton Brothers have their famous gunfight at the OK Corral.  ***  Realizing the historical significance of the event, they decided to meet there rather than “the empty lot behind the five and dime store.”

10.     On this date in history: 1858 - Hamilton Smith patents the rotary washing machine.  ***  The hard part was designing it to always make one sock disappear.