1. The NFL is planning to study marijuana for pain
management. *** Of
course, they’ll have to lift the restriction against smoking in the huddle.
2. Good news for Sean Spicer: He’s been invited to appear
on “Dancing with the Stars.” *** The bad news: His partner will be a motorized podium.
3. The World Health Organization says that at least three
people in the world have been infected with a new “superbug” strain of
gonorrhea. *** Actually, only two cases have been confirmed,
but they assume Charlie Sheen will make it three.
4. The Hallmark Channel has announced it will debut 33
new Christmas movies this year. ***
But only 2 new plots.
5. According the show’s producers, Donald Trump once
wanted to voice a character on “The Simpsons,” but was denied. *** In a
clear act of revenge, the President recently revealed that that rejection is
the only reason Homer isn’t the new Chief of Staff at the White House.
6. On this
date in history: Aug 4, 1970 – Jim Morrison is arrested for drunkenness. *** He was seen stumbling up to people on the
street and asking them to light his fire.
7. On this date in history: Aug 3, 1963 – Allan Sherman releases "Hello Mudda, Hello Fadda,"
a song about a camper’s letter to his folks.
*** Of course, today he’d post his
complaints on Facebook, send a text to his parents, and then contact Uber to
come and take him home.
8. On this date in history: Aug 2, 1991 – Funk singer Rick James is arrested and accused of sexual
torture. *** I believe he was
eventually charged with 12 shades of grey.
9. On this date in history: Aug 1, 1991 – Actress
Hedy Lamarr, 77, is arrested for shoplifting in Florida. *** Fortunately, it was before 4:00 P.M., so she qualified for
a reduced fine under Florida’s “Early Bird Special” laws for seniors.
10.
On this date in history: Jul
31, 1970 – Chet
Huntley retires from NBC, ending the "Huntley-Brinkley Report."
*** Actually, he quit in disgust
when Brinkley wouldn’t stop trying to get his name first.
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