1. President Trump is claiming that federal assistance to
Puerto Rico in the wake of Hurricane Maria was an “unsung success.” *** To
make sure that doesn’t happen with the current storm, the White House has already
started holding auditions for “Florence, the Musical.”
2. In Livonia, Michigan, traffic on I-275 was disrupted
Wednesday morning due to a “hazardous material” incident. *** A
police spokesperson said there was a serious accident involving several cars and
a water truck from Flint.
3. There are more and more rumors that Howard Schultz, the former
CEO of Starbucks, is planning to run for president. *** Great—instead of a leader who spends so much
time on the golf course, we’ll have one who runs the country from a laptop
computer at the corner table in a coffee shop.
4. Mattress Firm Inc., the largest U.S. mattress retailer,
announced they may file for bankruptcy.
*** No wonder the company’s in
trouble—every time they need to make a decision they say they’ll have to sleep
on it.
5. In explaining why she did not tell President Trump about
Bob Woodward’s request for an interview, Kellyanne Conway said Mr. Woodward
could have just called the switchboard. *** She seemed perfectly sincere…until she
wrinkled her nose and said, “One ringy dingy…two ringy dingy…”
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