Friday, August 28, 2020

News Humor for Week Ending Friday, Aug 28, 2020

 

1.   Microsoft and Walmart are partnering to buy the popular networking platform Tik Tok.   ***   In anticipation of a successful bid, Walmart is already designing its latest footwear fashion—the Tik Tok Flip Flop, and Microsoft has begun designing help desks for Aisle 3.

 

2.   Although Melania Trump’s speech at the Republican Convention was generally felt to be well delivered, some people were very critical regarding the military-looking outfit that she wore.  ***  They pointed out that it took TWO belt buckles to cinch her waist that tight.

 

3.   A federal appeals court has upheld a New York limit of 50 people at weddings, which is upsetting a lot of people because now they can’t invite all their relatives.   ***  Heck, with a max of 50 people, there are some places where the grooms wouldn’t even be able to invite all their wives. 

 

4.   Lori Loughlin and her husband were fined and sentenced to 2 and 5 months in prison for paying bribes of $500,000 just to get their two daughters into USC.    Ironically, they paid even more than that in legal fees just to get themselves into jail.

 

5.   A very expensive blackboard chalk, Hagoromo Fulltouch, reportedly has a cult-like following among mathematicians because of its smooth writing feel, resistance to breakage, and low dust factor.   ***   That’s fine for math professors, but English teachers won’t endorse it until every stick of chalk has built-in Spellcheck.

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