Friday, Jan 10, 2014

1.        During the recent blizzard a pregnant woman in Indiana had to give birth at home with no one there to help her.   ***  That wasn’t because of the weather…It’s because she had signed up for the Obamacare “bronze” plan.

2.        Snooki, from the TV show “Jersey Shore,” just got the results of a genealogical DNA analysis, and she was shocked to learn that she isn’t really Italian.   ***   I think the same thing recently happened to Olive Garden.

3.        JWoww from “Jersey Shore” announced that she is pregnant.  ***  Let’s see, JWoww is going to have a baby, and Snookie already had a baby, and Pauly D just revealed that he became a father a couple months ago…OH MY GOD!  THEY’RE MULTIPLYING!

4.        According to the National Youth Fitness Survey, three in four young American teenagers do not get at least one hour of daily physical activity.   ***   On the positive side, they have the strongest thumbs in the world.

5.        In Lexington, Kentucky, it was so cold that escaped convict Robert Vick turned himself in so he could get warm.   ***  In fact, it’s so cold that police are cutting down on crime by keeping their cars warm and driving slowly through town so criminals can jump in.

6.        The latest diet craze is to drastically reduce food intake for two or three days each week.  It’s called I.F., or “Intermittent Fasting.”  ***  That’s on the days you fast.  On the other days it’s known as IWG,  “Intermittent weight gain.”

7.        A study by Consumer Reports says that most raw chicken sold in the United States has “worrisome amounts” of bacteria.   ***   Or as KFC calls it, “Extra Crunchy.”

8.        In order to promote healthy eating by students, a school district in New York is sending parents a weekly report on what their child had for lunch.   ***  And, if the class bully stole your kid’s lunch money, the report will tell you what the bully ate.

9.        With cold weather sweeping across half the country I guess it’s appropriate that the top film at the box office this weekend was the Disney movie “Frozen.”  Second place was “Paranormal Activity,”  ***  which is the story about Congress recently agreeing on a budget.

10.     Dennis Rodman is headed back to North Korea with a group of former NBA players to play an exhibition game against the North Korean team.   ***   And President Kim Jong Un has announced that the halftime show will include a special performance by the North Korean national firing squad.