1. Researchers in Finland say that an attitude of anger, hostility and cynical distrust increases the chances of developing dementia. *** That’s terrible—not only are you always in a bad mood, but you can’t remember why.
2. A military judge has ordered the CIA to release records regarding the torture of prisoners in Guantanamo Bay. *** The agency is reluctant to do so, but they did offer to provide video evidence of a rogue agent named Jack Bauer throwing two terrorists out a window.
3. Stephanie Kwolek, who invented Kevlar, has died at the age of 90. She developed it while looking for materials for automobile tires that would improve fuel economy. Since then, Kevlar protection has saved countless lives around the world. *** That’s nice, but about that fuel economy thing…
4. Whole Foods agreed to pay $800,000 for including the weight of the container when calculating charges at the store’s salad bars. *** Whole Foods paid the settlement in cash. They actually only handed over $799,000, but said that it was in a $1,000 satchel.
5. Officials in North Korea have charged that a new American movie, “The Interview,” a comedy about the assassination of the North Korean president, is “an act of war.” *** President Obama responded quickly and decisively; he urged Hollywood to surrender.
6. The Supreme Court has ruled that police must get a search warrant before looking through an arrested person’s cell phone. The only exception is if the policeman feels threatened. *** For example, if the arrestee is about to post something really mean about him on Facebook.
7. Susan Sarandon and Geena Davis recently opened up about the filming of their 1991 hit movie, “Thelma & Louise.” *** I believe their comments were published in Cliff Notes.
8. To give boys a good role model, a California woman is marketing a toy action figure named Mac Mason. Mac’s not involved with weapons, violence or brute force. Instead, he likes camping, baseball and secret codes. *** So, Mac’s a nice guy, but I’ll bet he never gets a date with Barbie.
9. Rock legend Sting says he wants his children to succeed on their own merit, so he is not going to let them inherit his $300 million fortune. *** Congratulations, kids, you’ve just been Stung.
10. Hollywood gossip columnist Marilyn Beck has died. *** At least, that’s what people are saying.