1. A man in New York City has placed an ad looking for someone to take his pet turtle for a walk every day. *** It’s basically just a 12-step program.
2. Disney just announced that it expects to lose $75 million on the sea-rescue movie “The Finest Hours.” *** Previously, the biggest financial loss for moviemakers in 2016 was the Erin Andrews video.
3. In the latest presidential debate, Hillary Clinton said she was wrong in supporting a 1994 crime bill that resulted in longer prison sentences and cutbacks in inmate education. *** She apologized for having supported a bill that penalized so many fellow politicians.
4. This past weekend Lindsay Lohan posted a picture of an unidentified mystery man on Instagram with the comment, “I love him.” *** Let me guess—bail bondsman.
5. Ray Tomlinson, the inventor of e-mail, has died suddenly at the age of 74. *** According to the coroner, cause of death was having broken a chain letter.
6. On this date in history: Mar 11, 1302 – Romeo & Juliet's wedding day, according to Shakespeare. *** I wonder if everyone got their gifts back.
7. On this date in history: Mar 10, 1971 – The Senate approves the amendment lowering the voting age to 18. *** This gives millions more Americans the opportunity to show their ambivalence.
8. On this date in history: Mar 9, 1796 – Napoleon Bonaparte marries Josephine de Beauharnais. *** It was the last time anyone saw the minister, who made the unfortunate comment, “I assume you’d like this ceremony to be short.”
9. On this date in history: Mar 8, 1994 – The Defense Department announces a smoking ban in all workplaces. *** Soldiers are happy to learn that a war zone is not considered a workplace.
10. On this date in history: Mar 7, 1933 – The game "Monopoly" is invented. *** It teaches young children the principles of handling money, investing in properties and driving your best friends bankrupt.