1. The judge overseeing
the Toys ‘R’ Us bankruptcy case has ruled that the company can pay its top
executives $14 million in incentive bonuses. *** Even if they have to
break open every remaining Monopoly game to do it.
2. In a recent Huff Post article, experts
listed 8 signs that a marriage won’t last. *** Sign #1:
The husband’s last name is Trump.
3. Claire’s, a mall-based chain of jewelry
stores, has filed for bankruptcy. The store had targeted the teenage market and
said its mission was to “be a girl’s best friend.” *** In fact, a company spokesman reached out to those girls and
pointed out that in times of need best friends will sometimes loan each other large
sums of money.
4. Matt Lauer recently suffered another
humiliation when the famous Palm steakhouse took his caricature off the wall.
*** They also removed his
favorite table—the one with a pretend button underneath.
5. As Toys ‘R’ Us prepares to close its
doors, the company announced that all gift cards will need to be used in the
next 30 days. *** Barbie dolls everywhere are looking forward
to an updated wardrobe, a new car and several more boyfriends all named Ken.
6. On this date in history: Mar 23, 1775 – Patrick Henry shouts "Give me liberty or give me
death!" *** He then followed
up with “Give me an ‘L’…’Give me an ‘I’…Give me a ‘B’…”
7. On this date in history: Mar 22, 1933 – FDR
legalizes wine and beer that has less than 3.2% alcohol. *** Fake booze!
8. On this
date in history: Mar 21, 1980 – On
the “Dallas” season finale, J.R. is shot, leaving viewers wondering through the
summer, “Who shot J.R.?” ***
No kids, that wasn’t the main thing on people’s minds in the summer of
1980. Wait—actually, it was.
9. On this date in history: Mar 20, 1918 – Congress establishes daylight saving time. *** And spends the next 100 years trying to
explain why.
10.
On this date in history: Mar 19, 1997 – The Supreme Court hears Internet indecency arguments. *** Apparently the “pro” side won.
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