Friday, December 5, 2014

Friday, Dec 5, 2014

1.        David Muir, the anchor on ABC’s “World News Tonight,” has started posting a one-minute newscast on Facebook every weekday.  ***  And he’ll continue doing it until he runs out of cat material.

2.        Having split from Bruce Jenner, Kardashian matriarch Kris Jenner has been seen dating Corey Gamble.  ***  No surprise there; at her age every date is a gamble.

3.        A nuclear missile launch officer stationed in Montana has been charged with drug use and removed from duty.  ***  Good. We cannot afford to have those people impaired by drugs. Whenever the time comes, they need to be able to count backwards from ten.

4.        This week’s huge power outage in Detroit resulted in the loss of street lights, traffic lights…***…and, unfortunately, the light at the end of the tunnel.

5.        Anderson Cooper is already back on the air at CNN, just two days after an emergency appendectomy.  ***  However, his doctors told him to take it easy and start at 180 then gradually work his way back up to 360.

6.        Burt Reynolds is reportedly having financial difficulties, and he’s so desperate that he started teaching acting classes.   ***   Fortunately, he was able to find a few people who are so desperate that they’re taking them.

7.        Just before Thanksgiving Vermont may got 16 inches of snow.   ***  Which was great news for all the 15 inch turkeys.

8.        According to the IRS, every year more than 100,000 prison inmates file fake tax refund claims, although most of them are caught.  ***  Auditors always get suspicious when someone asks for their refund to be sent in cash hidden in the lining of a book.

9.        In a White House press conference President Obama announced that he will improve security with a new Secretary of Defense.  ***  And a new Secretary of De Front Door.

10.     An exhibit at New York’s JFK Airport displays weapons confiscated by TSA gents, including a credit card that can turn into a knife.  ***  Even scarier is a credit card that can turn into a $10,000 debt.

No comments:

Post a Comment