News for Week Ending Friday, Jun 10, 2016

1.  The government just announced it is investigating complaints regarding suspension components on the Tesla S model.  ***  Officials said the problem is serious and could result in irreparable harm to a Tesla driver’s feeling of superiority.

2.  A Harvard professor is using electronic components and jars of chemicals to build “artificial leaves” that can synthesize carbon dioxide into oxygen.  ***  He said the contraptions function OK, but it’s a real pain to rake them up in the fall.

3.  Astronomer Paul Cox claims there is a “Planet X” hiding behind the sun, and someday it will pop out and annihilate Earth.  ***  Good news, folks.  We might not have to endure an entire four years of Donald or Hillary.

4.  Hostess is recalling thousands of Ding Dongs, Chocolate Zingers and other snack foods because peanut residue in the flour could cause dangerous allergic reactions.  ***  That’s in addition to the normal reactions of weight gain, hyperactivity and tooth decay.

5.  Oprah Winfrey is launching her own line of food products called “Oprah’s Kitchen.”  ***  It’s the latest addition to her money-making conglomerate, “Oprah’s Cash Register.”

6.  On this date in history:  Jun 10, 1988 – Over 31,000 people in London participate in the world’s largest bicycle tour.   ***  Wow, can you imagine the huge logistical challenge? — All the medical support, the water stations, the steroids…

7.  On this date in history:  Jun 9, 1822 – Charles Graham receives a patent for false teeth.  ***   However, most politicians remember him for his second invention, the fake smile.

8.  On this date in history:  Jun 8, 1959 – The first official "missile mail" lands in Jacksonville, Florida.  ***   And the U.S. military is still using missiles to send a message. 

9.  On this date in history:  Jun 7, 1979 – Rock & roll star Chuck Berry is charged with tax evasion.   ***  Johnny B. Badde.

10.  On this date in history:  Jun 6, 1960 – Roy Orbison releases "Only the Lonely."  ***  It’s a sad, depressing song about people who don’t get any “Likes” on their Facebook posts.