1. The FBI has recovered Judy Garland’s “Wizard of Oz” ruby
red slippers that gave Dorothy the power to click her heels three
times and suddenly be home. *** After
reading that news, President Trump ordered a pair of ruby red golf shoes; he
wants to click his heels three times and suddenly be on a golf course.
2. In a recent interview, the CEO of Jetco Delivery said
that new technologies will make truck driving fun again. *** Actually,
I heard that’s what truck stops are for.
3. Disneyland is now offering alcoholic drinks for the first
time in the park’s history. *** But it’s a little embarrassing for guys who
want bourbon and have to order a “Mickey Mouse on the rocks.”
4. At Aretha Franklin’s funeral, a steady stream of speakers
talked about the Queen of Soul and her place in heaven for all eternity. *** The
concept of “eternity” can be difficult to fully comprehend, but after the 8
hour service most attendees had a pretty good idea.
5. A can of pepper spray accidentally discharged on a
Hawaiian Airlines flight from California to Maui. *** According to
eyewitness reports, it panicked the passengers, shocked the flight attendants
and woke up the pilots.
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