1.
Luxury Travel Intelligence
has just named Robert DeNiro’s Philippine hotel, Nobu, “The Worst New Luxury
Hotel of 2015,” saying the accommodations are fine but management is weak. *** And
whenever a guest asks for service, the staff always says, “You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? Then who the hell else you
talking…you talking to me?...”
2.
A man in Oklahoma was so
upset over his hotel bill that he drove his pick-up through the lobby and
crashed into the front desk.
*** After that, I guess he didn’t
need to ring the bell.
3.
“The Hunger Games” star
Jennifer Lawrence told Stephen Colbert it’s not a good idea to contact aliens
from outer space because we would just try to kill each other. *** She
said if scientists continue to reach out, she’ll start keeping a bow and arrow
by her bed.
4.
Hillary Clinton says
she has a “360 degree plan” to destroy ISIS.
*** Yep, I think 360 degrees
would be hot enough.
5.
With the help of a
spiritual medium, the Kardashian girls’ departed father, Robert Kardashian,
gave them a message from the grave.
*** He told them he’s been rolling
over a lot.
6.
On this date in
history:
1582 – The Netherlands, Denmark and Norway
adopt the Gregorian calendar. *** They were especially impressed by Miss
April.
7.
On this date in
history:
1813 – In the War of 1812, the British take
Fort Niagara. *** It
wasn’t easy; just to get to the fort they had to fight their way through
hundreds of honeymooners.
8.
On this date in
history:
1979 – The Budweiser streamliner set a wheeled
vehicle speed record of 730 mph. *** The
Clydesdales were exhausted.
9.
On this date in
history:
1979 - "Love Story," starring Ryan O'Neal
and Ali McGraw, is released.
*** Millions of men stop
apologizing.
10. On this date in history: 1977 - "Saturday Night Fever," starring John Travolta,
premieres. *** In
the following weeks, thousands of men strain their vocal cords trying to sound
like the BeeGees.
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