News for Week Ending Friday, Jul 20, 2018

1.   The FDA has announced that some dog foods have ingredients that can lead to canine heart attacks, and they recommend owners either stop buying those brands…   ***  …or start practicing CPR on their dog.

2.   Former “Today” host Matt Lauer is reportedly furious that he had to pay his ex-wife $50 million in their divorce settlement, but he’s optimistic about getting back into television.  ***   If he can just borrow cab fare to get to the interview.

3.   Crocs has added a new line of shoes, the “Cypress Heel,” which takes the traditional Crocs design and adds a high heel.   ***   It’s reminiscent of the ill-fated attempt to put high heels on flip-flops, which resulted in an epidemic of twisted ankles up and down every aisle at Walmart.   

4.   According to the Times of London, Prince Charles and Prince William could have joined the Queen in meeting President Trump but claimed that they had “other engagements.”   ***   Charles said it conflicted with his Zumba class and William said he had to mow the lawn.  

5.   Last week Stormy Daniels was arrested during a strip club routine and taken away in handcuffs.  ***  The famous porn star objected vehemently and tried to explain to the arresting officers that handcuffs usually have a fur lining and they always go on the guy.

6.   On this date in history:  Jul 20, 1878 – The first telephone is introduced in Hawaii.   ***  Of course, it was pretty useless until they introduced the second telephone. 

7.   On this date in history:  Jul 19, 1848 – The first women's rights convention is held in Seneca Falls, New York.  ***  Attendees were kicked out if they had asked their husbands for permission.

8.   On this date in history:  Jul 18, 1940 – The first successful helicopter flight takes place in Stratford, Connecticut.   ***   Previously, the only successful hovering had been done by overly protective mothers.

9.   On this date in history:  Jul 17, 1955 – Arco, Idaho becomes the first U.S. city lit by nuclear power.  ***  It was a nice, soft glow from the reactor. 

10.  On this date in history:  Jul 16, 1926 – National Geographic takes the first natural color undersea photos.   ***   They were impressive, but most readers still preferred the shots of naked jungle women.