1. Officials at the Mexican prison where “El Chapo” is being held following his recapture say there are four times as many security cameras as before. *** They are very confident that when El Chapo escapes again they’ll be able to make a fantastic documentary (Sean Penn directing, of course).
2. A man buying a lottery ticket in Las Vegas told a news reporter that if he won he’d spend it on hookers and cocaine. After a lot of negative response when that went viral, he said he was kidding and would spend it on friends and community. *** Too late, buddy—God’s still not going to let you win.
3. Nike may drop its sponsorship deal with trouble-prone Cleveland quarterback Johnny Manziel, who ignored team orders and PR consequences, and went gambling, drinking and clubbing. *** Actually, Nike, there’s no better person to exemplify “Just Do It!”
4. Donald Trump says he doesn’t watch much professional football anymore because the NFL has “become soft.” *** He said the physical game is rough enough, but he’d like to give the players a few lessons in trash talk.
5. Mexican authorities asked Justin Bieber and his entourage to leave the ancient Mayan ruins at Tulum after they tried climbing them. *** Officials said if Mr. Bieber wants to explore cultural ruins he should go back to Hollywood.
6. On this date in history: Jan 15, 1797 – The first top hat is worn in London by John Etherington. *** a.k.a. “Shorty”
7. On this date in history: Jan 14, 1956 - Little Richard releases "Tutti Frutti." *** My translation app says that “tutti frutti” is Italian for “all fruits,” but it’s having a little difficulty with “wah bop a loo bop a lop bom bom.”
8. On this date in history: Jan 14, 1973 - Grateful Dead bass player Phil Lesh is arrested for drug possession. *** Headlines across the country announced the shocking news: “Four Members of Grateful Dead Not Busted on Drug Charges.”
9. On this date in history: Jan 13, 1920 – A New York Times editorial claims that rockets will never succeed in flying. *** Ironically, rockets are now flying high and newspapers are failing.
10. On this date in history: Jan 13, 1979 – YMCA officials file a libel suit against the Village People for their song, “Y-M-C-A.” *** They submitted the necessary paperwork and then used their arms to spell “S-U-I-T.”