News for Week Ending Friday, May 5, 2017

1.   NASA researchers have concluded that one of Saturn’s moons, Enceladus, has all the necessary factors for sustained life.  ***   But they’re not sure that Earth does.

2.   Some airlines are planning to reduce legroom by as much as 2 inches.  ***   Now United will have to use excessive force to get passengers into their seats.

3.   After Donald Trump’s surprising comments regarding the Civil War, Dan Rather compared the president to “a gradeschooler.”   ***   Mr. Trump strongly rejected that criticism, but he did agree to stop signing executive orders with a crayon.    

4.   This week Mexican authorities arrested notorious drug kingpin Damaso Lopez, a.k.a. “The Graduate.”   ***  They also arrested a Mrs. Robinson (and told Mr. Lopez he should have gone into plastics).

5.   On the Ellen DeGeneres Show, Kim Kardashian said the Paris robbery had a profound impact and made her less materialistic.  ***  But, with the help of her family, she was able to stay strong until the feeling passed.

6.   On this date in history:  May 5, 1847 – The American Medical Association is established in Philadelphia.  ***  With the rapidly growing healthcare business, an organization was needed to help doctors coordinate their tee times. 

7.   On this date in history:  May 4, 1814  – The Bourbon reign is restored in France.  ***  I’m not sure what that was all about, but the concept of “Bourbon rain” sure sounds good.  (Now, that would be my kind of “singin’ in the rain.”)

8.   On this date in history:  May 3, 1997 – Garry Kasparov begins a chess match with IBM supercomputer Deep Blue.  ***   To make things fair, Mr. Kasparov was not allowed to go to the restroom, and Deep Blue could not call the help desk.

9.   On this date in history:  May 2, 1876 – Ross Barnes hits the first home run in the National League.  ***  For a brief time he holds the record for most home runs, longest home run, shortest home run… 

10.  On this date in history:  May 1, 1751 – The first cricket match is played in America.   ***    I believe that was also the last cricket match ever played in America.