Friday, June 16, 2017

News for Week Ending Friday, Jun 16, 2017

1.   Fugitive polygamist Lyle Jeffs was arrested by FBI agents who found him living alone in his truck after his 8 wives and 60 children left him.  ***  I guess he should have had a bigger truck.

2.   Many United Airlines customers are unhappy with the restrictions of the new budget fare, “Basic Economy,” such as a limited carry-on, no seat changes and being the last to board…   ***  …so the other passengers and crew can point at them and laugh.

3.   A Virginia Beach high school student who participated in a big toilet papering prank was barred from graduation ceremonies and will receive his diploma in the mail.  ***  But the school principal promised him it would be a very special diploma: 2-ply, perforated and pulled off a roll.

4.   A woman in Grand Rapids was kicked out of a shopping mall because she was wearing a tank top.   ***    Geesh, and at Wal-Mart you’re kicked out if you aren’t.

5.   Little-known Aldi plans to invest $3.4 billion to become the third largest grocery chain in the country by building new stores and updating existing ones.   ***    Unfortunately, a company spokesman confirmed that $3.4 billion won’t be enough to fix all the grocery carts with one wheel that goes “Clunk… clunk… clunk… clunk…”       

6.   On this date in history:  Jun 16, 1961 – Soviet ballet dancer Rudolf Nureyev defects to the West in Paris.  ***  It was tough for him to avoid detection, being the only guy running down the Champs d’Elysees in tights.

7.   On this date in history:  Jun 15, 1951 – The first commercial electronic computer is dedicated in Philadelphia.  ***   People were amazed by the powerful new technology and spent the rest of the day playing solitaire. 

8.   On this date in history:  June 14, 1954 President Eisenhower signs an executive order adding the words "under God" to the Pledge of Allegiance.  ***   Cautious White House lawyers, however, were reluctant to approve the change without first getting God’s permission.

9.   On this date in history:  Jun 13, 1927  – Charles A. Lindbergh is welcomed to New York City with a ticker-tape parade. ***  The only people not celebrating were the street sweepers.

10.  On this date in history:  June 12, 1967Israel wins what became known as “The Six Day War.”  ***   That was very impressive—it was originally scheduled to go nine.

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